Back due to popular demand (three people emailed me)...
The Fantastical Return of the 'Stupendous Adventures of Bale and Bentley'
Gareth: How's tricks?
David: I'm playing first team football week in week out.
Gareth: I know. I'm playing too. It's lush.
David: It's amazing! I get to play on the right-wing and the gaffer rates me for it.
Gareth: You think that's good? Can you not hear the noise after I do something special on the pitch?
Gareth/David: BALE, BALE, BALE...
David: What about me? I get cheered and applauded, even with the facial hair.
Gareth: Hobo chic is in.
David: It's in because of me. I made it 'in'. How did we both manage to turn things around?
Gareth: I don't know. I guess we were both patient, bided our time and got a bit lucky too?
David: It has nothing to do with luck Gareth. It was hard graft. And to think we were both lined up for moves away a few months back.
Gareth: We really got our shit together.
David: We did, our change in fortunes was because we both believed we would overcome the adversity.
Gareth: BALE, BALE, BALE...
David: Give us a hug!
Three months earlier…
Al: Ziggy says the odds are not very good.
Sam: How 'not good' are they?
Al: Oh, you know. They're way down there not good.
Sam: You're not helping Al. What am I meant to do here?
Al: Ziggy had a new data search component installed and we had to have it shipped in from Hong Kong and I think that gave a little jet-lag to its cpu processing chip...
Sam: Why do you make this stuff up all the time? Why don't you just say, 'Sam, we don't know'. Why don't you just do that for once instead of making it all up?
Al: Well, that wouldn't be any fun, would it?
Sam: A little help please.
Al: You sort of look like a half man half chimp cross-breed. Oh, hold on, Ziggy's now 91% sure that you're here to save this man from some kind of voodoo hoodoo curse.
Al: And Ziggy's also 98.9% on the money that when you're done with him, you'll be leaping into that man over there to save him from a life wasted living in skips.
Sam: What man?
Al: The one star-jumping and crying profusely.
Sam: Oh boy...