Good news, the wait is nearly over

I have some decent news. Without fail, every summer when I'm out of the country sunning it up in the Mediterranean, Spurs sign players. Last year as I lounged on a sun-bed I got a text message to tell me that David Bentley had signed. Christ, how I jumped for joy at that one. So, the big day is this Friday. That's when I jet out of Blightly for 7 days of 100 degrees Fahrenheit temps. And that's when the transfer floodgates open for a refreshing shower of much wanted incomings and thankful outgoings at White Hart Lane.

I'll ignore what the tabloids are saying this morning, as it's simply a re-hash of what the message boards were talking about last week. Although, ironically, telling you what the boards are saying is probably what the newspapers are reporting on today. So…

Patrick Vieira. A not so golden oldie. A player who hasn't been anywhere near exceptional for a few years now. The ITK's say it's a done deal. Which probably means it won't happen. If it does, what we have is a player who could galvanise the players around him much like Edgar Davids did when he signed for us. Does he still have what it takes? I have no clue. Haven't seen enough of him for Inter and I'd hazard a guess that the slow-pace of Serie A is a far more comfortable zone than the fast-paced EPL. I guess if he is 'cheap' and the contract is short, I have no reason to complain. You never know. He might still have something about him, enough to bring further stability to our midfield. The fact that he's ex- scum obviously grates me. But if a player wears the Lilywhite, then he has my backing. For 5 minutes at least, after that, I'll tear him a new one if he doesn't perform to the acceptable standards.

As for the other whispers. It’s the same names being touted out to the same clubs in the same repeated rotation. Sunderland signed Frazier Campbell after being linked to Bent for an age. Fee can't be agreed between us and them over Darren. We want Jones as part of the deal (shudder) but apparently Villa are now front-runners and are hoping to claim Bent as their own. This, unsurprisingly, means that Young is coming to us because Downing is now a target for Martin O'Neill. Bentley is also somehow involved in all this as some form of bargaining chip. It's probably the 10th time now that a variation of this transfer saga has made the headlines.

Huntelaar is still getting a mention, but it's probably nothing more than agent talk to push Stuttgart into finalising the deal to sign him. I can't see him at Spurs.

There are some fresh stories, believe it or not. But nothing overly exciting. Sheffield United youngster Kyle Naughton is a target along with team-mate Kyle Walker. But both players (if signed) would remain at their current club for next season, for development as they are both kids. Everton have been heavily linked with Naughton. Nothing certain, except that its factual thanks to Sheff United comfiring the interest. Talking of Everton...

Tim Cahill is getting a mention from some quarters (LOLZ) having been apparently sighted with Harry Redknapp (ooh). I know Everton are hard up, but there is no way that Cahill would move on from Goodison Park. Just my opinion. If it happens, I'll shave my head.

One piece of devastating news is that Chimbonda is happy to stay at Spurs. Until someone finds him. Apparently Pascal is aiming to break the hide and seek world record. My guess is that he's managed to hide himself behind the stack of unsold copies of the Opus in the store room at the Spurs club shop. But there's no need to look straight away.

So, as you can see. Another week, the same stories doing the rounds with one or two new entries to add. I think we've been linked now with around 85 players since the end of the season. What does this mean? I'd guess that Levy has rid the club of any potential leaks, leaving hacks and fanboys throwing shit at the wall hoping some of will stick.

Until I leave the country, keep the champagne on ice.