Tread lightly

Dear Mr Levy, 

What have you done to the soul of this club I cherish so dearly? For it is soulless.

Firstly, no official word on Gareth Bale. All this spending of money. Are we meant to believe you and Joe Lewis have suddenly found a shoe box full of Sterling under the bed? That's some shoebox. What's the label on it say? 'From Perez with love'.

So where is Bale's new contract? Where is the statement to echo those made by Andre Villas-Boas and the players that Bale is not leaving? There is no new contract is there? Look at Bale's face, the sheer turmoil, the distress. How can anyone survive, imprisoned on 100K per week, trapped in the fortress of solitude, a white heart that deserves to be released from its pain.

Alas, there is no echo either. All we have is an eerie silence.

A tumble-weed that slowly moves across our conciousness as a reminder of the desolate landscape you reign over like a mad conqueror surveying his kingdom of dust. For you have conquered all, that there is no doubt. Whilst you sit on your throne sampling the delicious fruits of your labour, we the peasants, the great unwashed, beg in the streets for mercy. But you turn the other way, without regret or remorse, and continue to gorge on our loyalty and rest on your bed and pillow made up of gold coins where you sleep and dream of more gold coins.

Do not think however that all of us stand below you without seeing through the transparency of your evil domain. Some of us have our eyes wide open and do not fear to look into your heart of darkness.

If the Bale saga wasn't bad enough along with the brutal systematic removal of his image from social media, you've corrupted the masses with StubHub, encouraging Spurs supporters to horde their tickets for profit, seeking to make money from the desperation of others in what can only be described as legalised touting.

You've sold the Britishness of the team, our English lion-heart in Scott Parker and our youth players including Stephen Caulker and Tommy Huddlestone, both of which have so much potential, yet surplus to requirement whilst you look abroad to spend the money we're going to get from selling Bale on players nobody has ever seen play including a striker not that far off from thirty. Sell on value anyone? Take a look at our pre-season for all the evidence you need.


That's not the name of another foreign target, so put your cheque book away. Easy to see what the new training centre is about. Churn out talented English youths to finance expensive erotic imports.

Our enemy down the road are showing far more calculated patience in this window than we have, preferring to let us sign their cast-off targets whilst they bide their time for bigger and better players.

Then there's the butchering of loyalty points which were struck down and killed, its rotting body exhumed and its head chopped off and impaled outside the West Stand gates at White Hart Lane.

Then the worst crime of all.

I awake this morning to discover that we have a new sponsor, AIA, that have had their red font sellotaped onto the Lilywhite Spurs shirt that will be worn in all cup games including Europe. Red? Red letters? Do you purposely seek out companies that have logos that contradict everything this club stands for? Thomson, Mansion and now AIA? I could have lived with it, just about lived with it, if...IF THERE WAS NO RED ON A WHITE SHIRT! Does anyone care to allow grey matter to ignite common sense in your marketing department? It looks like you blindfolded Chirpy, sliced his hands off, and told him to spray some claret onto a shirt. This is positively criminal.

If you do not replace the red lettering or at the very least ask AIA to consider blue then I will boycott all purchases of Tottenham kit wear and in addition your range of men's briefs and tea mugs. You expect supporters to buy the AIA shirt? You must be red-faced over this fiasco...and loving it.

Whatever next?

White sleeves and ghastly red covering the entirety of the chest? Or maybe just a subtle splash on the badge akin to the 1883 - 1884 shirt? Or maybe just go all the way with a completely red shirt to resemble the 1890 - 1895 kit? I know, why don't we just uproot and move to Plumstead? No time for half-measures, right?

You're Goddamn right!

Honestly AIA? What next? Stick the word 'Car Wash' below it and continue to launder money? Get yourself a porkpie hat, change your name to Heisenberg then pass me the blue meth. It's the only way any of us are getting high.

Tread lightly Levy.  

You have pillaged this club, this club that Nicholson built. This club that Burkinshaw led.  There used to be a football club here? Now there's a Sainsburys. Your legacy is a ghost town of non-development. History around the ground demolished, to be replaced with empty promises and impossible dreams. 

Congratulations Daniel Levy and Joe Lewis. ENIC wins. Maybe you should complete our misery and ask West Ham if we can ground share in Stratford. 

Yours never,