"Let's be honest, without me they'd be playing Championship football"
"It's going to be swansong for Luka. Chelsea will sign him, he's got to go there"
"If we win the cup its because I won it not because Spurs won it"
"I'm going to play Bale at centre-back, he's a natural, he can play anywhere and it's his best position"
"If you delve into history, I invented football in China just after I cracked time travel"