Seizure Gory

 

The Tottenham shirts, home and away, have been released with some of our star players and Paulinho sporting constipated faces as they don the new colours. Which are mostly like the old with additional unnecessary design elements and the fabled red haemorrhaging in the middle of the home shirt so that we retain a sense of consistency with our dislike for the clubs marketing and merchandising departments.

It doesn't really matter, it never has. Unless you invest money in replica shirts and kits, there isn't that much of a point in concerning yourself unless of course you wish to see us parade with half-decency as we stutter to finish fourth.

I said in an earlier article that the training shirts looked better than the leaked first team kits (which turned out to be the actual kits) as they embraced a more minimalistic look. Also, if you've got a professional footballer modelling them, chances are both will look infinitely better on them than on most supporters.

"Seize glory? You giving me permission to sign for Barca?"

"Seize glory? You giving me permission to sign for Barca?"

The massive AIA sponsor in bemoaning red is an eye sore. But this is our third red sponsor now. Let's just admit defeat and accept Spurs will never wear an all white home shirt with no yellow bits and a colour coordinated advert in the centre that isn't intrusive because the entire shirt is fundamentally an intrusion on our senses. The sponsors will always opt for their own traditional colours on the home shirt. I reckon having the font in white like the away shirt would have suited it far far better.

Every season the kits change.

Under Armour get to flex their creative muscles (yes, the Bill Nicholson gates in the inside collar is a nice touch, something you can appreciate for all of the 2 seconds you see it before you wear the shirt). Another nice touch with the eleven stripes on the away shirt representing the eleven trophies won by Nicholson. The away shirt is the best of the lot, even though it's hardly a colour we've associated with our travels.

Spurs get to make a nice little profit for their high interest account. We all get to invest far too much time and effort in either hating it, liking it or trying to like it. I'm only writing about all of this now because this is as close as we've come to signing a new player this summer, seeing our current ones wearing our newly distorted colours.

To top it all, we've got 'Seize Glory' and 'I will' as the promotional tag-lines. I think the latter is for Adebayor. 'I will turn up for pre-season this year...oh wait, no I won't'. As for seizing glory, seizing it isn't the problem. Holding onto it is. Maybe everyone can wear Hugo's gloves to guarantee we live up to the marketing campaign.

COYS and all that.