Not sure which one I prefer.
Real Madrid fabricating their interest in Gareth Bale as part of their special relationship agreement with Spurs, helping us to truly push the THFC brand around the world using Bale as an instrument of publicity and hype. The idea being, Real Madrid are attempting to sign him for a record breaking fee - all eyes on Spurs rejecting any bids and retaining the services of the most sought after player in the world. In the mean time Levy slaps Perez on the back as they enjoy a joke and we agree to let them have Bale for a discounted price next summer - having maximised our revenue potential by keeping him for an extra season.
Something something keep everyone busy looking at us and Madrid and Bale something something whilst Arsenal are dragged to the edge of the window with their pursuit of Luis Suarez and then BANG, Madrid sign Suarez leaving our neighbours dead in the water whilst that oh so special relationship between Levy and Madrid finally comes to fruition in not to dissimilar fashion as say, Redford and Newman in The Sting.
Ladies and gentleman, I present to you the alternative to Marca and the British tabloids...THE INTERNET.
Good night all.